Khullam Khulla #11: Safe, Period?
Welcome back to Khullam Khulla. This week, we return to two of the fundamentals of life (literally!): menstruation and sex.
The sexpert received the following query:
Q: “I want to know if it’s safe to have sex during period? My wife and I are both 24 years old. We don’t have any unhealthy habits. We enjoy a healthy sex life and have intercourse twice or thrice daily. During her period, we refrain from having sex. However, I find it difficult to hold back and want to know if it’s safe to have sex during her period.”
Twice or thrice daily? Without a doubt, that is a healthy sex life, you lucky rabbits!
In his response, Dr. Watsa focused on hygiene—cleaning yourself with soap, being gentle. And no doubt, that is important (see our tips on clean, compassionate period sex). But what I’m wondering is: What do you mean by “safe”?
If your concerns are about, say, hurting your wife or somehow passing diseases between you, then you have little to worry about. Although STDs are passed more easily during menstruation because of the amount of blood, I’m assuming that you’ve both already been tested, given the amount of sex you have (or that any diseases have already been shared).
If you mean “safe” as in “protected” as in “will we get pregnant?,” well, then it’s a different story. It’s a common myth that a woman won’t get pregnant while she has her period. Women are most fertile during ovulation (half-way between two periods), when the ovaries release the egg into the fallopian tubes. If the egg isn’t fertilized, the woman’s uterus sheds its lining, along with the egg, about 14 days later. This is the period, and it’s undoubtedly a hard time to get pregnant as both the uterine lining and the egg are exiting the body (and the hormonal cycle isn’t primed for pregnancy).
Yet, it’s not impossible. Different women have different length menstrual cycles, so ovulation can start pretty soon after the period. And if an enterprising sperm should meet a fertile egg—well, that’s how babies are made. It’s happened to the best of us.
So, to return to your question: If you just want to know if you can have sex at all during your wife’s period, my answer would certainly be ‘yes’ (as long as she is comfortable with it, of course). If you aren’t planning on getting pregnant right now, however, make sure that you use condoms and/or that your wife is on the pill or another contraceptive device. And this holds true for the whole month, not just during her period!
So be safe, and enjoy each other all month long.